(Note: This post has been updated (2) as of 6:11 PM Eastern on 6 Sep. See below)
Dear Alex,
I've just ordered Björk's new CD, Medulla, and her Vespertine CD as well. With the single exception of a Sinatra album I once owned many years ago, after their arrival here they'll be the only non-classical recordings ever owned by me. I've never heard anything by Björk or of her music; in fact never even heard her name before your repeated mention of it on your weblog The Rest Is Noise. I didn't order the CDs because of that repeated mention, nor because of your New Yorker profile on Björk (I haven't read it because not online), but because you, a music critic for whom I've respect, notwithstanding your too-frequent flogging of the pop cultural, and your willful attempts to blur the line (of what is in fact a chasm) distinguishing pop from classical music, felt her musically important enough to make such mention, and write such a piece.
While it's only a measly $25 I have to lay out for these CDs, and a first listening to them will take up only a few hours of my time, and while I don't at all mind spending money even when in short supply, and don't mind spending any amount of time when required, I do so hate wasting either. So, after listening carefully to these CDs when they arrive, I will either extend to you my thanks for your heads-up on this performer and her music, or dispatch my good friend Guido to your apartment to discuss the matter with you personally. No need for concern that the discussion, should it be necessary, will take up too much of your valuable time. Guido is a man of very few words, I assure you.
Best regards,
ACD
Update (3:25 PM Eastern on 6 Sep): Alex Ross responds, adumbrating in, um, curiously detailed and precise language my critical response to the not yet auditioned by me Björk CDs, and makes me a Guido-nullifying offer I probably shouldn't refuse.
Update (6:11 PM Eastern on 6 Sep): Oops. Alex slightly reworded his Guido-nullifying offer (from, "So confident am I that ACD will hate the record, in fact, that I am prepared to refund him his $25 if he likes, " to, "So confident am I that ACD will hate the record, in fact, that I am prepared to refund him his $25 if he likes it."), which rewording, I'm afraid, removes the offer from the category of Guido-nullifying.
On The Road To Prohibition
